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Choosing Disadvantage

My friend Todd of Love is Concrete has been saying that “Love is a disadvantage that we choose.”

That phrase has really got a grip on me. It clicks something important into place. Because what’s the opposite of that? Using. If you’re not choosing disadvantage, you’re using, you’re manipulating, you’re keeping your guard up, you’re protecting yourself. It doesn’t mean you’re the most cynical or cruel motherfucker on the planet, it just means you’re primarily benefiting yourself.

Love, on the other hand, is giving, uplifting, being vulnerable, opening yourself to pain. It’s expending energy to the greatest good of others–a disadvantage that we choose.

It strikes me that this is what Story by the Throat is. It’s the kind of vulnerability I seek, in games, in telling stories together–letting our guard down and creating something that speaks. My hope is that it can carry over into living, and being vulnerable there, to not be afraid to make a story with each other.

I don’t know exactly what that means yet, but it’s a thing of power. It’s living without pretense, without manipulation, without fear and distrust and victimization.

I want that. I want that in stories, I want that in games, I want that in life.

Stories are a disadvantage that we choose.

Life is a disadvantage that we choose.

Love is a disadvantage that we choose.



3 thoughts on “Choosing Disadvantage”

  1. thank you for listening, joel. That means a lot.

    and yes, i *do* see the irony that the first time i commented on the blog you’ve been asking me to look at was when you mentioned me. TOO-SHAY.

  2. That’s not irony. . .that’s human nature. 🙂

    Thanks for coming by. Since it’s your concept I’m pillaging, do you have anything to add or expand on?

  3. only that i was talking to my friend Breena today and it occurred to me that “finding the advantage at all costs” (the opposite of love) is not hate, but pride.

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